WHY SOME WOMEN FALL FOR MARRIED MEN & WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT...PART ONE...

Part One
This subject is taboo for alot of folks, but Gracie wants to take time to uncover "Why some women date married men".This is not to "GLORIFY" cheating, on the contrary, this is an awareness of what could be attracting females to married (commited) men. Yes, morally it is wrong, but it is going on every day so if we can expose the attraction behind it, then we will be able to turn things around for the better. Most married (commited) women do not want to think about this until after it happens to them. What is so enticing about  when some women see a ring on a man's left finger? Let's move on to discuss the attraction. These statements come from women who have dibbled & dabbled with the unforbidden fruit of married men.

***MARRIED MEN SPEND MONEY--It's no secret that most times you have to pay to play. Married (commited) men that date outside of their relationship recognize this cliche. If a bill needs to be paid or if she needs extra cash in her pocket, a MM will most likely oblige his lady friend.

***RING ON LEFT FINGER--When a woman sees the ring on his lockdown finger, she automatically assumes that he knows how to treat a woman with love & respect.

***TIS THE SEASON--Married men will give an abundant amount of gifts to his lady friend.

***FLY THE FRIENDLY SKIES--Whether flying, driving or riding the Amtrak, married men will risk taking their lady friend on a trip, even if it's just for one night.

***COMMITMENT UNAVAILABILITY--Some women don't want to be tied down in a commited relationship so they seek out married men to alleviate that issue. Some women are bored or unhappy in their marriages or relationships so they search for excitement via an unavailable man.

Now that we see why some women are attracted to & date married (commited) men, let's discuss some reasons "WHY" these commited men are so Ripe for the picking. The top reasons why married men stray from their relationships are:

***BOREDOM

***UNDER APPRECIATION

***WANNA SEE IF THEY STILL HAVE IT

***FOR MORE SEX OR SEXUAL EXCITEMENT

***NO LONGER ATTRACTED TO HIS MATE

***SOMEONE TO TALK TO

Stay tuned in to GLS for Part 2 of "WHY SOME WOMEN FALL FOR MARRIED MEN & WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT.... as Gracie gives step by step ideas to help protect your relationship against the temptations of other women.

WANNA KEEP YOUR WOMAN BEGGING YOU FOR MORE OF YOU? LESSON #2...READ THIS...

AFTER THE COMMITMENT SERIES...Lesson #2


The After the Commitment Series is geared to help men keep the good times rolling in their relationship or to revitalize a sagging relationship. A commitment can mean marriage or a couple that are exclusive. In Part One we learned Lesson #1: IN ORDER TO KEEP YOUR WOMAN CRAVING YOU; GIVE HER THE ATTENTION THAT SHE NEEDS.(see "WANNA KEEP YOUR WOMAN BEGGING YOU FOR MORE OF YOU Part One 10-22-2014)  Now let's move on to  Lesson #2.

People change. It's just that simple. No one person stays exactly the same forever. This is true for both men and women. They both grow and evolve with each day and each experience. If a couple does not grow together, they will definitely grow apart. The key to a man staying in tune with his woman to grow and evolve with her is to (drum roll) LISTEN TO HER!! Now fellas, when I say listen to her I know some of you are saying to yourselves, "Hell, I listen to her all of the time" or "When in the hell does she ever shut up?" But what you have to realize is it's a difference between "hearing" her talk to you and "listening" to what she's saying when she is talking to you. Yes, it is a HUGE difference.

Hearing= senseless chatter & listening= comprehending thoughts. Please know that if you truly listen to your woman she will tell you EVERYTHING that you need to know to please her. She will leave you no guesswork.  Just think about it, when you first hooked up with your girl you listened to any and everything that came out of her mouth. You didn't skip a beat. You were listening so intently to her because you wanted something from her. You were interested in her and you needed to know her likes, her dislikes and everything in between. Your goal was to win her over. How would you know how to please her had you not listened to her from Jump street? You would've never made it to first base. Ok, now you've won her over and you have the trophy to show for it (a warm soft body laying next to you). Then all of a sudden it happens. One complaint turns into two and two complaints turn into three and next thing you know she has a grocery list of complaints. Why? It's because you aren't LISTENING to her anymore to know what pleases her. Doesn't it make sense to listen to her like you did in the beginning so that you will know how to continue to make her happy? Remember people change. Thoughts and desires change, so as your woman is evolving and growing, you are no longer in the mix. You think to yourself, "I don't know what she's complaining about, I go to work to pay bills, what else does she want from me?" The thing is, women are supporting themselves now a days, they are no longer waiting on the man to take care of them. That's not what she needs. In this case, the man is worried about the wrong thing. However, he has no idea about it because he is no longer taking his time to LISTEN to his woman.. Guys, if you want your woman to not be able to get enough of you, trust me, lend her an ear. When a man listens to a woman he shows her a sign of respect. He is silently telling her that what she is saying is valuable to him, therefore, SHE is valuable to him. Every woman needs to feel important to her man. When a woman feels important to her man, it makes her feel alive and sexy. So,  let's recap, "WANNA KEEP YOUR WOMAN BEGGING YOU FOR MORE OF YOU?" Practice LESSON #2: LISTEN TO YOUR WOMAN SO YOU CAN STAY UPDATED ON HER WANTS,GOALS,DREAMS & DESIRES. She will appreciate you in ways that you could never imagine. For more info on love & relationships stay tuned in to GLS

WANNA KEEP YOUR WOMAN BEGGING FOR MORE OF YOU? Part One... READ THIS...

AFTER the COMMITMENT SERIES: Part One


Ok fellas, that title is an eye catcher. I know you are wondering if it's really possible for you to be so irresistible to your woman that she will be begging you for more of you? The answer to that question is ABSOLUTELY! Yes, it is possible for you to keep your woman's attention stayed on you, but you have to be willing to do the work. It's not as hard as you think. Listen closely while Gracie explains to you how it's done.


You've finally found "THE ONE". She's smart, sexy and great with children. She's a hard worker and attends church on Sundays. Your family loves her and your friends thinks she's cool. She's a savage between the sheets and she even gives you He** when you want it. BOY OH BOY she is a keeper. You've worked really hard to impress her. Breakfast, lunch and dinner dates, walks in the park, weekend trips and outings with her family. It all paid off because she is finally yours. Yes, you won the prize, but how do you keep the sparks alive?

You won the prize (your woman) because of all the wonderful experiences and fun times that you shared with her. She fell in love with you during those times, so doesn't it make sense that to KEEP her in love with you, you need to continue to do the things you were doing when she first fell in love?

Guys, please don't misunderstand this statement. Women are not fools, they understand the ups and downs of life. She knows that money gets tight sometimes or at times you may have to work late. She realizes that even her Superman (you) gets tired and needs rest. She even accepts the fact that she has to share you with other family members, friends, children and obligations. This DOES NOT bother her. What breaks her heart is when you place and leave her on the back burner to forget about her. Instead of being the priority that she once was, she is now an afterthought. You make excuses in your mind such as, "She'll understand" or "She knows I love her". If she starts complaining about your lack of attention you begin with another line of thought assaults like, "She ought to be grateful" or "If she doesn't understand me or what I'm trying to do for us, it's just too damn bad". These kind of thoughts breed resentment. You resent her because she is complaining and she resents you because you no longer give her the attention that she needs from you. This can be avoided by you making sure that your woman feels she is the most important part of your life. PLEASE DON'T TAKE THIS LIGHTLY. No, this isn't about kissing her a**, it's just about balancing your priorities and time. You  may not be able to do all of those things that you were able to do in the beginning when she fell in love with you, but if you express to her that you would do those things if you could, most likely she will understand. It's always the SINCERE thought that counts with women. She needs your attention like in the beginning when you gave it to her freely. THIS IS WHAT MADE HER FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU, not the flowers, gifts or dates (although they didn't hurt. lol) The problem happens when a man commits to a woman, then places her to the side to forget about her. The flow of love that she gives you will be blocked by this. You may have heard  a friend say, "Before we got married my wife used to cook, clean and sex me down, now she only cooks and cleans sometimes and I have to wait weeks for sex". This does not have to be your relationship, especially if  you practice the pointers that Gracie gives you. The truth is, a relationship takes work, but will be very rewarding if you put in the time and effort. Let's recap:

Lesson #1--TO KEEP YOUR WOMAN CRAVING YOU; GIVE HER THE ATTENTION THAT SHE NEEDS (not necessarily lavish trips & presents, give her the gift of your time)

Stay tuned in to get Part Two of the After the Commitment Series: Coming soon on GLS

1O SIGNS TO KNOW IT'S TIME TO MOVE ON...#BADRELATIONSHIP....

Let me start off by saying that no relationship is perfect. They all have ups & downs. Sometimes we get stuck on a "relationship roller coaster" and just don't know how or when to get off. Never allow someone to break you down to nothing. Stand up for yourself and leave that scumbag in the dust! Gracie Love Strategies has put together a list for those that are torn between being a Ride or Die chick (or dude) or a Fool that's riding on "The Road of No Return". The Road of No Return is the road that your no good mate sends you riding down when you have gone over & beyond for them, kissed their a**, accepted all kinds of disrespectful behavior and mannerisms, bent over backwards, went all out for and none of it was good enough. All of it was a waste of time because your mate still does not want you. Once you arrive to this intersection you may as well kiss your relationship goodbye. Your mate will Never take you seriously and will either continue to dog you or eventually leave you. This is tough talk but, Gracie prides herself in getting her readers in "fighting shape" for their relationships. Check out these signs, and if any sound familiar then you know it's time to GET TO STEPPIN!!
                                 10 SIGNS TO KNOW ITS TIME TO MOVE ON






***WHEN HE NEVER CALLS YOU- The only time you talk to him on the phone is when you call him and it's a rushed conversation cut short.
***WHEN HE DOESN'T MAKE or KEEP PLANS WITH YOU- If you suggest an outing and he always comes back with, "We'll see" or "I'll let you know", but never follows through.
***HE ONLY SEXTS YOU PERIOD- He only texts you when he's sexting and he never responds to any of your texts if they are not sexual.
***HE CONSTANTLY PUTS YOU DOWN OR DISREPECTS YOU- Calling you bad names, embarrassing you in front of friends and family. Talks harshly to you.
***YOU HEAR THROUGH THE GRAPEVINE THAT SHE'S DATING OTHER MEN OR HAS MOVED ON- You didn't get the memo, but your best friend saw her at the mall holding hands with her "play brother".

***WHEN THE PROS NO LONGER OUTWEIGH THE CONS- When you find yourself more unhappy, frustrated and sad with her in your life than without her.

***WHEN YOU KEEP WAITING FOR THINGS TO CHANGE-  Months turn into years with no change in sight.


***WHEN YOU ACTUALLY START BELIEVING THE LIES YOU KNOW SHE'S TELLING- You start making excuses for her actions.
***WHEN YOU START LOVING HIM MORE THAN YOU LOVE YOURSELF- Always putting his feelings and needs before your own. Not expressing your true feelings for fear of losing him.
***WHEN YOU'VE BEEN DATING FOR YEARS BUT YOU'RE STILL WONDERING HOW HE FEELS ABOUT YOU 




These are signs that you (men & women)  should keep in mind when deciding if you should leave or stick around for the long haul. All relationships face tough times sooner or later, but you need to know when your mate is crossing the line. If these signs are a mainstay in your relationship, please recognize that there is a problem. Don't allow a troubled relationship to strip you of your self esteem and joy. Don't be afraid to let go to make room for something better to come into your life. If you want to know the first step in walking away; it's simple. JUST PRAY! Prayer changes things. Prayer helps you get through things that you cannot do alone. Take one day at a time. It may not happen over night, especially when you are extremely attached to someone. Constantly repeat to yourself, "I AM AN AWESOME PERSON AND I DERSERVE BETTER"! Even if you don't believe it at first, eventually you will. You will begin to feel stronger and then that day will come when you will tell your mate: ADIOS AMIGO!! For more info. on love & relationships, stay tuned in to GLS.












 

IT'S OVER, SO WHY CAN'T I STOP THINKING ABOUT MY EX?...

A member of GLS named, Kaylyn wrote in that she has moved on to a new relationship with a decent guy that she cares for. They met through another couple and have been dating for over a year. The new boyfriend was going through a difficult time when they met and she was there for him. She moved into the perfect girlfriend role pretty quickly and has been holding him down every since. The new boyfriend has a new job and a new outlook on life now, all because of Kay. She helped him to find a job, get his personal business in order and was even there to help him through various family ups and downs. She says that although her current boyfriend is not perfect, she truly enjoys their relationship and has high hopes for a future together. The only thing is, she can't stop wondering about her ex. She wonders how far they could've gone in their relationship had his sister not interfered which eventually caused them to break up. She says her ex was kind hearted and made her feel special. He didn't make as much money as she does either, but he made up for it in different ways. He since then has tried to rekindle their relationship, but Kay didn't want to play games with him or her current man so she declined.
My response to Kay is this:


Dear Kay,

The reason that you're still wondering about how things "could've turned out" with your ex is because he made you feel special in a way that you still remember. From jump street with your new boyfriend you've been his knight in shining armor. You've played the Captain Save a H** role with him the entire time the two of you have been together. Sure, you enjoy yourself with him, but it doesn't come without a price. For every time you enjoy yourself with him, he turns right back around and needs you to put on a hard hat and some steel toe boots. Your roles are reversed. You are the dude and he is the broad. This has nothing to do with you acting masculine or him acting feminine, it's strictly role reversal. So it seems, IT'S ALL ABOUT HIM.  Honey, you need a break! You must be exhausted. On the other hand, when you speak of your ex, it seems that IT WAS ALL ABOUT YOU. That is an awesome feeling for a woman to experience with a man. You didn't mention that the two of you had any real problems other than his Ugly sister! (GLS really sticks up for their members) This is the reason that you keep wondering if things could've been different between you and your ex. You miss that special feeling that he provided and that is so important to a woman. I suggest you take a pause for the cause (the cause is your sanity) to see if your new boyfriend will pick up and carry the ball in your relationship. Hopefully then he will be able to create that special feeling for you. No woman should be deprived of that feeling. Don't short change yourself. You are a beautiful person. Anyone that would jump in to help somebody the way that you've helped him deserves the best. For more info on love and relationships stay tuned in to GLS or contact Gracie directly @gracielovestrategies@gmail.com

8 SIGNS THAT A MAN MAY BE THINKING ABOUT CHEATING...READ THIS...

Getting cheated on is a hurtful experience. You feel betrayed, insecure and abandoned by your mate.
You are devastated and have no idea what to do next. You secretly start blaming yourself, wondering if  it was anything you could have done differently to stop it. Your girlfriends rally around you in support. One asks you if would like her cousin Day Day to  "take care of" your mate. Another one begins to tell you that you will be fine because her mate cheated on her 12 times last year, (but she only mentioned once) and she is doing just fine. (she takes a pharmacy full of anti depressants). Lastly, your other girl is storming around your home gathering his things screaming about a garage sale  she's planning for this Saturday.  You feel like your life is in shambles spiraling out of control. You ask yourself, "why me"?  "I trusted him", you tell yourself. "What in the world do I do now"?
Does this sound familiar? Have you or anyone you know ever experienced something like this?
Unfortunately, this is an all too common scenario. No one can control anybody else or their actions, but we can stay alert for any signs that our man may be thinking about cheating. The key is that when you see the signs, do not ignore them. It's better to be proactive in this type of situation than to try to play "clean up" when or if it happens.
Firstly, cheating is not just about intercourse. It is being hugged up on the phone, talking and flirting, texting or emailing someone that would consider sleeping with you. It's feeding any type of attraction physical or emotional for anyone else besides your mate. Your mate could mean your husband, wife, girlfriend or boyfriend. Anyone were a commitment is made. Let's take a look at some signs that will alert you if  your man ever starts thinking about straying.
                                8 SIGNS THAT A MAN MAY BE THINKING OF CHEATING
***SEX LIFE GOES DOWN- Nobody can  have sex 24/7 like it's their job, (unless it is) but be familiar with YOUR sex cycle. If you usually have sex twice a week and now you're down to once every two weeks, then you know there is an issue brewing somewhere. Check it out!
***HUSH HUSH BEHAVIOR- He is in the basement in the storage room near the Christmas tree behind the bubble wrap whispering on the phone. He's spending a lot of time out in the garage on his phone. He carries his phone everywhere he goes even if he is home. He walks around with it clipped on his boxers and takes it in the bathroom when he is showering.
***HE ALL OF A SUDDEN CHANGES OR PUTS A LOCK CODE ON HIS CELLPHONE
***UNEXPLAINED ABSCENCES-He starts breaking his normal routine. If he usually gets home from work by 5:00, now he is coming in at 6:30 and then later and later. When you ask him where he's been he gives you explanations like, "I had to drop off a co-worker" or "I stopped off at the store" or "I ran into my boy Slick and we kicked it" (but you've never heard of his boy Slick)
***CONTSTANT STORE RUNS- This is popular especially on the days that the two of you are supposed to be home chilling all day. He runs to the store for milk, then back for bread. then back for chips, then back for pop. ( you get the picture)
***MORE TIME ON FACEBOOK- He is spending an exuberant amount of time on social media.
***HE STARTS TO TAKE MORE CARE WITH HIS APPERANCE- This is a sign that somebody told him he was cute or he is trying to attract someone's attention that he thinks is cute.

***HE SLOWS DOWN HOW MUCH HE CALLS YOU- This could be a sign that he is talking to somebody else instead of you.

These are some warning signs that may help you catch a "Would Be" cheating partner before anything goes down. Maybe your dude wants more attention from you, or maybe he feels under appreciated. No, we can't blame ourselves for what our other halves may do, but we can stay aware that they are human beings and have needs. We must stay mindful of the time that we share with our mates and should try to ensure that they are happy. This goes both ways. Women for men and men for women. Relationships are difficult enough to keep running smoothly without an extra person getting into the mix. For more info on love & relationships, stay tuned in to GLS

PUT AN END TO THE 6 TOP RELATIONSHIP INSECURITY ISSUES...READ THIS...

Everyone suffers from insecurities every now and again. No one can escape them. They could be in the form of a relationship, "I wonder if I'm handsome enough"? or "I wonder if this shirt looks good on me"? or "I wonder if my breath is fresh or if I need an Altoid"? It could be in the form of a job, "I wonder if I'm smart enough"? or "I wonder if I will fit in with my co-workers"? It could even be singing in the church choir, "I wonder if I can sing as good as the other sopranos"? or "I wonder if they will finally pick me for a solo"? These are all examples of insecurities. They are ALL normal. It's when the insecurities plague our lives turning into paranoia that they become a threat to our happiness. Have you or your mate ever been insecure in your relationship? Let's talk about how to recognize and combat insecurities so you can move on to enjoy healthy relationships.
                                             TOP 6 RELATIONSHIP INSECURITY ISSUES

***FALSE EXPECTATIONS- No one is perfect. In a perfect world people never make mistakes. They are always kind and loving. Nothing bad ever happens because they live up to each other's expectations and never let's one another down. This would be awesome, except it's a fairytale. No relationship is peaches -n- cream all of the time no matter how good the couple are together. The truth is, we are all different with different styles, different tastes and different dreams. Because of this we must be careful of the expectations we place on each other as well as the judgment we inflict on one another when we fail. No one wants to be in a relationship with some one that holds them hostage to a strict set of expectations. LET IT GO so you and your mate can be who you really are, therefore embracing the authenticity of your relationship. Never judge your relationship by the standards of others.

***STOP LIVING IN THE PAST-All of us have a certain amount of baggage that we shift around from one relationship to the next. Maybe you were cheated on. Maybe you were lied to. Whatever the case, you've moved on learning from your mistakes and experiences. However, learning from your mistakes does not mean never trusting again. When you do this you automatically cut yourself off from any future happiness that is waiting for you. You gotta keep telling yourself that "that was then and this is now". Every new person deserves a new chance. You can't blame a person for the mistakes of others. You also don't want to wait around as if waiting for a person's downfall. You could be enjoying yourself instead of wasting time on a worry that could clearly never happen.

***DON'T ASSUME THINGS- When you start assuming things you are opening up your mind to a wild imagination. Next thing you know, you've created a whole scenario that is totally made up by you (false). Women tend to take the lead on this one, HOWEVER, not to blame the man but sometimes men just do not give up enough information. A lot of times men get irritated when a woman asks questions, but in turn will complain when she's spent an endless amount of time formulating a huge story in her mind that he will call ridiculous. Men, do yourselves a favor and allow your woman to ask questions. Nobody is trying to put you on the witness stand but she asks questions because she is interested in you. She's not nosey or don't say she asks stupid questions. Don't assume she can read your mind or that she knows already. Your best bet is to answer her questions then instead of waiting until she's derived her own story. It's a perfect way to keep the peace.

***COMMUNICATE WITH EACH OTHER- I once knew a guy who used to say, "Aint nothing like a good understanding". These are words to live by. When you have an understanding with each other, it kicks assumptions out the door, it chokes out imaginary stories and it TKO's accusations. It leaves nothing to the unknown, therefore leaving nothing to be insecure about. You run into your ex boyfriend in the mall but you fail to mention it to your mate, but then your 5yr old happens to tell  him. Right, you get the idea. it's just not worth all the hassle of keeping secrets.

***DON'T BE NEGATIVE- Some people are filled with "What If's". "What if this happens?" "What

 if that happens?" You can't possibly enjoy the present if you constantly worry about the future. I used to be guilty of that. I would be so consumed with "What If's" that I didn't realize that the good times in my relationship were passing me by. It wasn't until things got tough that I looked back and thought, "Wow", things were good back then. Thinking positive is a choice!

***DO NOT SABOTAGE- Some people are just comfortable with being uncomfortable. I had a friend like that. No matter how good his current relationship was, he would always go back and try to kick it with one of his ex girlfriends. He would whine and complain about getting a good woman, but shortly after he would get one, like clock work, he would go chasing after one of his exes. I just came to the conclusion that he was afraid to be happy. He couldn't handle it. Unfortunately, happiness was just not a good place for him. He allowed his fear (insecurities) to turn in to paranoia which kept him from being in a happy relationship. Don't sabotage your good relationship because of your fears. You will never get to experience joy to it's fullest because you will never give yourself a chance.

At the end of the day, no insecurity holds enough weight for you to give up on enjoying life. Your past, other people's experiences, what may happen in your future, it all does not matter. No one knows what tomorrow will bring. Don't let your past predict your future. For more info about insecurities and relationships, stay tuned in to GLS.